I’ve always felt there’s a profession more deviant and despicable than used car salesman or insurance underwriter. That would be the “human resource” career track. Throughout my 20+ year career, they have been referred to as inhumane and no-resource.
This week I received a call from a lovely human resource woman. She was screening me for several positions in the company. Strengths, weaknesses, what do you like doing, what is your management style, etc…. Then came a question I couldn’t believe. I was so thankful I was on the phone. She didn’t see me hold the phone out, cock my head and mouth “what the fuck?”
“What do you see yourself doing in five years,” she asked me.
I laughed a little and said, “You are kidding me, right? I think I was 25 the last time I was asked that question.”
She back-peddled a little and waited for my response. During the three-second delay, I crafted the best should-be-copyrighted response:
“Considering I walked home on 9/11, I don’t think about the future that much. I live every day like it will be my last. All I can hope for in my career is to use all my skills, get some kind of satisfaction out of the work, and produce meaningful results.”
I guess the response was good enough. She called me two days later for an interview.